LIVING LIFE

Unlike many women, I do not like wearing dresses. Whenever possible, they are my last choice. The majority of the time I wear jeans, pantsuits, or jumpsuits. There are, however, rare times when I will choose to wear a dress.

Recently, one of my friends invited us to her 75th birthday party. She did not require “cocktail attire”, but she was hoping her guests would “dress up” for the occasion. Being as I had plenty of notice, I found a dress which was flattering and comfortable – a rare find. I decided that wearing a body suit under the dress would be an even better idea being as they are credited with making you appear ten pounds lighter.

I ordered several styles in hopes that one of them would be successful. For those of you who have purchased these innocent looking items, you know that just trying them on requires the skills of a contortionist. I am not sure how women do not dislocate their hips, back or shoulders in the attempt to position the suit correctly. If you manage to perform the necessary Houdini-like movements, you are still faced with the task of taking it off.

Contestant number three was the most comfortable and I could actually breath normally once it was on. I must admit that the dress looked really good and I was happy with my decision until I realized that using the bathroom was going to present a new challenge. In order to prevent the entire bodysuit from completely rolling up, unusual dexterity was required in order to blindly secure three sets of fasteners while holding up an ankle length dress.

As soon as we arrived home, I tossed the pretty, but challenging item on the floor as if to punish it. It is currently residing in the back of a drawer where it will undoubtedly stay for many years.

Dressing for success is not easy.

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