LIVING LIFE

A few years ago, my husband and I decided that, in light of increasing crime rates, earthquakes, and floods, it would be a good idea to purchase a home safe. We chose a location which was accessible, but hidden. It was in fact so well hidden that we completely forgot about it for several years.

Last month we realized that it was time to move important items to the safe. After locating the instruction booklet, we discovered that there was no key – the only way to open the safe was with a code. In spite of pushing countless button combinations, everything that appeared on the screen remained in German. The only thing I understood were the multiple exclamation marks, which I interpreted as a warning that I needed to stop harassing this very heavy, expensive nonfunctioning object. Truthfully, I deserved the safe’s attitude in light of the stream of four letter words I was using.

The following morning, I called the store where we purchased the safe, and within five minutes, it displayed English and exclamation marks (same attitude), but the door opened.

It’s not easy staying safe.

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